The Beautiful Wedding

My 32-year-old son tied the knot in spectacular fashion last Saturday.  I give credit to the bride’s family, the Nonanthum Resort staff, and the city of Kennebunkport, Maine for welcoming the wedding party and guests and for creating a celebratory atmosphere for the entire destination wedding weekend.   Out of the 185 guests present, only 2 actually reside in Maine.  The balance traveled from 25 states and two foreign countries.  This was no small invasion of the small town, especially given that a good number of the invaders were black in a state that is 98% white.  We were treated with warmth, dignity, and respect by the bride’s family and friends and by the residents in Kennebunkport.  I am amazed by how relieved I was  by the reception we received every day.  The simple act of being appreciated as a fellow human being contributed volumes to the enjoyment of the event.  I didn’t feel invisible or hyper-visible, just welcome and that was refreshing.

The 4pm wedding itself was wonderful, especially since it didn’t rain.  As the couple were exchanging their vows, I felt precisely three raindrops and I whispered, “Please God, not now.”  Thankfully, the dark clouds held their water for the entire evening.  And Sarah’s dad acknowledged in his toast that he would never again plan a wedding in Maine in early June as the weather was so unpredictable.

But this had to be the most incredible wedding I’ve ever attended.  I enjoyed myself immensely.  The venue was beautiful, overlooking the harbor. The jazz musicians who played during the ceremony and happy hour were great.  I enjoyed more than my fair share of bacon wrapped scallops and clam chowder shooter appetizers with a sip or two of my rum and coke.  I enjoyed my filet mignon meal while others enjoyed their stuffed chicken breast.  The nine piece cover ban, Eye 2 Eye was truly extraordinary.  They were out of Boston and kept everyone on the dance floor.  They even did a great job accompanying my daughter, Nicole (a professional singer), when the groom insisted that she sing a song.  She sang “At Last“,  the romantic song written in 1941 and made popular by Etta James 20 years later, as the bride and groom once again took the floor before being joined by other guests.

This was a modern wedding complete with a few twists that took me by surprise from the start.  Upon arrival at the outdoor venue, I saw my son and his beautiful bride taking pictures together!  When did it stop being bad luck to see the bride before the wedding?  I guess its been a while since they even have a name for this phenomenon.  They call it “first look”.  The photographer takes the official wedding pictures before the wedding so the couple and families can fully enjoy the reception afterwards.  I liked this.

The second surprise was that Sarah’s eldest brother officiated by the powers invested in him by the internet.  Given the religious upbringing of both parties, I was a bit surprised, but Patrick did a fine job and said all the important things. But some traditions remained in tact.

There was the first dance of the bride and groom.  There was the father-daughter dance.  And oh gee, I was so busy preparing for my poem at the rehearsal dinner and my blessing at the reception (both went well) that I literally forgot about the mother-son dance that follows the father-daughter dance.  Thankfully, I had already slipped on my comfortable party slippers, abandoning those silver nightmares that matched my outfit.   I love to dance and so it was really no big deal.  My son had chosen the 1962 song, “Stand by Me” by singer-songwriter, Ben E. King, and we joyfully danced our hearts out.  I returned to the table to find family members in tears.  Yes, the words to the song are indeed moving, but really, some people are so sentimental.

Another surprise was that there was no wedding cake.  I knew Wesley didn’t care for cake, but I had no idea that Sarah wasn’t a fan either.  So, they had a nice dessert table instead and I enjoyed a chocolate covered strawberry.  By the end of the night, 11pm, I realized there was also no throwing of the bridal boutique or garter.  I’m not exactly sure why that fun tradition was discarded, especially since there were plenty of  guests whom I surmise would have been eager for the chance to walk away with one of those prizes. There was also no official send off as everyone still standing boarded a party bus for an after party at a local bar and grill. I’m told the bride and groom got 2 hours sleep before the Sunday morning brunch, also hosted by the bride’s parents for anyone able to make it.  But one surprise was pure pleasure.

What we all thought were monogrammed cloths to clean our glasses, turned out to be monogrammed  kerchiefs to wave in the Second Line Parade as the bride and groom led with their white and black umbrellas.  This was a shout out to their four years living in New Orleans where the bride attended medical school at Tulane University.  That kerchief will have a second life in my purse as a glasses cleaner, if I can find it.

Life is full of milestones: births, deaths, birthdays, anniversaries, graduations, and weddings.  These milestones are opportunities for us to stop and to collectively celebrate and reflect on our lives, our accomplishments, and our commitments.  They inspire us and remind us what we can aspire to.  Weddings are a milestone that commemorates the joining of two lives and two families.  And my son’s was done in spectacular fashion.

So, congratulations to the mother and father of the bride for a beautiful destination wedding and to the bridesmaids and groomsmen for their love and devotion to my son and new daughter-in-law before and especially during the exhausting 4-day event.  And a special shout out to Joe Wise, whom I have announced as the “Greatest Best Man Ever”!