Dangerous Anti-Social People

After I became fully vaccinated, I never took off my mask in public places. Instead I purchased masks from Amazon that clearly indicated that I was vaccinated for a few reasons. First, I needed to protect my husband who is medically compromised so I wanted to mitigate my exposure. Second, I wanted to encourage others to also get vaccinated, particularly other African Americans like myself because we have low vaccination rates in my county. And finally, I wanted to ensure people didn’t mistake me for an anti-vaccine person because I was still wearing a mask. Until this week, I hadn’t viewed my desire to protect the common welfare as a pro-social act. But it is. As an introvert, I’m no social butterfly like my daughters. I used to think anti-social behavior was about avoiding social gatherings and I didn’t like that about myself. But now I realize that this is only one meaning of the word. I learned that the meaning of anti-social behavior has a whole other definition.

Events of this week highlighted the destructive, yet obstinate behavior of some people. In light of the new Delta variant, mask restrictions for indoor activities became necessary again and a stronger push for vaccines became evident. But some people are displaying their anti-social dispositions by filing lawsuits against mask mandates in schools, mounting protests against restrictions, acting out on flights, and even refusing to wear masks indoors or to get vaccinated. Even in my local Target, I saw individuals without masks this week with looks of defiance on their faces. To me, people like this display the same selfishness, lack of morality, and lack of social responsibility as criminals who vandalize, scam, steal, rape, and murder anyone in their path. I looked for a definition for the kind of behavior I was seeing and I came up with “anti-social”. To my surprise, that word hit the mark.

The summary of multiple dictionary definitions for the other meaning of anti-social is: acting in a way that is detrimental to society. It seems that we have a growing number of individuals among us who can accurately be described as “anti-social”. Some are our neighbors, family members, television and radio commentators, and Republican House members like Marjorie Taylor-Green (Georgia), Jim Jordan (Ohio) and Matt Gaetz (Florida). Senator Rand Paul (Kentucky) can be labeled as anti-social for his dangerous rhetoric. And of course Florida Governor Ron Desantis is in this category because of his homicidal policies, outlawing mask mandates. Bullies and purveyors of false information who use television and social media platforms to spread their garbage are anti-social people. And the consequences of these anti-social individuals not only destroys our notion of common decency and safe communities, but the consequences are deadly.

So, what to do? A member of one of my Facebook groups who identified as an older man asked what we should do about people who make rude and nasty comments about others. Some said to ignore them and to model better behavior. Others said it’s not worth raging at them. I thought about it. The answer cannot simply be to pretend like these anti-social people do not exist. I think it makes them act even more outrageously because they are seeking attention and to these people, silence is consent. So they will do whatever they want to get what they want whether it is money, fame, or to feed a destructive addiction unless they are stopped. The problem is that anti-social people become louder and more obnoxious in their behavior if they face little to no consequences for their actions. And we face bigger problems when young people see anti-social people get away with their destructive antics. They feel increasingly unsafe and the few anti-social among them will think it is okay to behave that way. We have seen this first hand.

It should come as no surprise to us that when the media gave Trump a platform to spew lies, bully his opponents, hurl insults, and promote false narratives, others have followed. We now have an epidemic of anti-social behavior alongside a growing mental health crisis and out of control violence. It is time to restore our social contract that we learned in kindergarten. That contract included common decency, courtesy, mutual respect and consideration for others.

I think in our families, work places, social media circles, friendship circles, political lives, and media choices, we must insist on pro-social behaviors that will not destroy the fabric of our general welfare. I don’t think we can afford to ignore those who make destructive comments, who refuse to wear protective masks and get vaccinated, and who knowingly spread false information. Nor can we afford to de-fund the police and release violent criminals from prison early. The kid gloves of the greater society need to come off and consequences have to be doled out to anti-social individuals. House members who make false and offensive statements should be fined and censored. Airline passengers who refuse mask mandates or fight with flight attendants should be fined and banned from future flights. Rude comments on social media should be tagged as rude and unacceptable by “friends” and spreaders of false information should be sued when they cause harm to others who followed their lies. Communities need to ban together to rid themselves of the thieves, bullies, and violent criminals among them. And sometimes that means mothers need to do what is right for society when their sons do wrong.

We’re living in the society we collectively shaped. Personally, I hate what I’m seeing and I want to change it. Biden was right when he said this is a battle for the soul of America. After electing an anti-social president, our society is suffering the consequences of those four years. I’m hopeful that there are more people who are pro-social than anti-social and that we pro-social folks will become more forceful in our insistence on building a stronger and better society that promotes the general welfare.

2 Replies to “Dangerous Anti-Social People”

  1. Several of the children who initially spread the disease were intentionally left unvaccinated by their parents. Outbreaks such as the one in the Disneyland theme park are becoming increasingly common due to falling vaccination rates. Undoubtedly, organized anti-vaccination groups have contributed to the drop in vaccination compliance and anxieties concerning vaccination. These groups often have a strong presence on social media and well-developed websites that attract people to their cause. But these sites have drawn very little critical attention. In order to combat falling vaccination rates, it is important for those supporting vaccination to be aware of, examine, and counter the claims of these groups.

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