Beyond Birthdays, Babies, and Cats

I’ve been on Facebook since 2008. For most of that time, I’d describe myself as a “Facebook voyeur” content to keep up with the life events of family members, old friends, colleagues, and former students. I rarely posted much and if I did, I paid almost no attention to likes or comments. My notifications, friend requests, and instant messages got little, if any, attention for months at a time. I was on Facebook to observe, not to contribute. But that has changed since the election of Trump and the disruption of COVID-19.

I haven’t changed as a person. I’ve always been an outspoken advocate on issues of social justice, human decency, and compassion for humanity. That advocacy was expressed in my work with and on behalf of students, in my community as a volunteer, in my giving of financial resources, and in my consistent communication with political leaders. What has changed is my engagement on social media platforms.

The pandemic physically separated me from my students and colleagues. Suddenly, we weren’t having those important discussions or rallies or meetings of the mind around important social justice issues. I was no longer sitting with friends, colleagues, or students providing a listening ear to life dilemmas or encouraging the discouraged. I think the absence of a regular platform on a university campus and at academic conventions initially because of COVID-19 restrictions and then from my own retirement forced me look for an alternative outlet to continue advocating for of a better society and helping individuals navigate life. That platform became Facebook, Twitter, and now Instagram.

One of the things that became apparent was that I’m not very good at using these new tools. I’m thankful to my daughters who tutor me. This past week, my younger daughter spent a couple of hours teaching me how to use Instagram. I learned from my older daughter that I need to respond to people, so I’ve done that. However, you can’t just say anything. I got put on time a one-day suspension on Twitter for replying to Congressman Jim Jordan that his pandemic lies were killing his constituents. In the Twitter world, that bit of truth was a bridge too far.

I also learned that not everyone who sends me an instant message has good intentions. In fact, I received two scam attempts from people pretending to be someone else. The first was someone pretending to be a colleague whom I knew personally. Red flags quickly came up and I stopped responding. The second was a message from a deceased friend. I reported that person to Facebook. No surprise that there are people with bad intentions on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. Among the three, I find Twitter to be the most combative, hence the phrase, “Twitter wars” is a thing. Since becoming active, I’ve found myself engaged in a couple of them: one involving a woman’s right to choose and another about vaccines. I’m disappointed by how quickly some people resort to personal attacks when their arguments fall apart.

I learned not to befriend everyone who sends a friend request. Since I am creating content that I want people to see, to increase my views, I recently put out a lot of friend requests to people with whom I have at least 40 common friends. However, I noticed that my political and social justice content has inspired what I believe to be a lot of white male “Trump” folks to make “friend” requests. I’ve ignored those requests, having once been threatened with violence by one of them. I had to unfriend that person.

As an analytical person, I rarely shy away from an argument among my “friends”. So, on occasion, I will get into a back and forth with someone on an issue I believe is important. I had to explain to my children why I bother with people who say ridiculous things. My reasoning is that I feel a duty to that person and to those who read their comment to provide an opposing viewpoint. I wouldn’t allow half-backed ideas to pass in my classrooms and I won’t scroll past them on Facebook or Twitter if the issue is important. I view challenging misinformation or specious comments as my duty to society.

The opportunity to fulfill my calling as an educator, counselor, and a social justice advocate is what continues to get me out of bed in the morning with a pep in my step. Every day, I look forward to finding creative ways to share my ideas about current events that affect our lives now and in the future. And more importantly, I’m constantly looking for ways to inspire others to take an active role in creating the kind of life and society we all want to live in.

But the truth is, I still enjoy looking at the travel pictures, the babies, the wedding pictures, the food pictures and holiday decorations. I’ve even joined a couple of BTS fan groups: BTS! Dope Old People, BTS Army Over 40, and BTSArmyMom International. However, I must confess that I’m just a little frustrated when pictures of my homegrown tangerines receive many more likes and responses than my commentary on preserving our voting rights.

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