Some of my favorite Bible passages that guide my everyday life are found in the book of Proverbs. I began discovering and unconsciously memorizing verses in Proverbs as a young teenager. They have become the underlying principles behind much of my decision making and lifestyle choices. In the next few posts, I’ll share some of my favorite Proverbs and how they have impacted my life and relationships.
The first is a well-known and often quoted passage. Proverbs 3:5-6 reads, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct your paths.” For an analytical personality like mine, this became an essential reminder for me that I don’t know everything, that information can be incomplete or distorted, and that things are not always what they seem. It is a comfort to trust that I can rely on the God who knows, sees, and understands the daily road I tread and to trust that He will get me through life successfully as I trust His direction. And I do.
I make a habit of listening to my heart even more so than listening to my head. Some people call that voice intuition. Some say it means to follow your gut. Others call it the voice of the Holy Spirit or that still small voice. Whatever it is, it is the voice that I trust and follow even when reason or the evidence I see and hear seem to indicate that I should go a different way. I’ve learned through failure and many experiences that the voice of my heart is always right.
To people who know me, it may sometimes seem like I’m clairvoyant, highly intuitive, or foresighted when in fact I have simply learned to tune into the voice in my heart. I say things like, “I just know” or “I just feel” or “I see this happening”. I have dreams. I see snippets. I hear an inaudible voice. I receive inspiration and “good ideas”. These have been the norm for me for many years and I accept them as normal. I’ll make decisions on whether to take on a new venture or not based on what I’ve come to call “grace” for the venture. It simply means that I feel in my heart that God is providing the open doors, the skills, the courage and the energy to see the project through. I’ve relied on this “grace” so much that I have only ever applied to one specific job or one specific University throughout my entire education and job career and have always been accepted without a moment’s worry. It’s not that I’m so great, but that I had a confidence born from hearing this voice to apply to a particular place.
A good example of a time when I had to fight my head in favor of the voice was when I decided to finally pursue the doctoral degree that I’ve known that I wanted since high school. I didn’t know when or in what subject, but I knew that degree was in my future. As my children neared adulthood and I had earned my master’s in counseling and guidance and was enjoying my career in higher education, I started feeling that the time was approaching. So, I applied to the PhD program in Educational Psychology at the University of California, Santa Barbara and was accepted. However, I felt this strange uneasiness in my heart when the acceptance letter arrived. All indications were that it was the perfect program and that the timing was perfect. But I couldn’t shake the uneasiness. That letter sat on my desk for three full weeks before I finally obeyed the voice in my heart and notified the University that I would pass on the offer. I knew that the “grace” to start that program was absent.
I waited another two years. One day in passing, I heard about an EdD program at the University of California, Los Angeles (UCLA) and I immediately felt a strong urge in my heart to apply. I even had to learn the difference between a PhD and an EdD. I was so glad that I waited because in the two years since foregoing the PhD program, I discovered that I enjoyed being a hands-on practitioner who enjoyed transforming research into practice. I enjoyed policymaking and practical engagement as opposed to teaching and research. That was the difference between the two degrees. And an EdD, which I didn’t even know existed, was a much better fit.
Again, I was accepted and this time I strongly felt that the grace to pursue the program was there. I was one of a few in my program who sailed through the program in three years, completing and defending my dissertation without having to make any adjustments to it, which I’m told is unheard of. It was a lot of hard work and really long hours. It was grace that got me through hour (or more) long drives to UCLA several times a week and an unbelievable amount of reading and research, projects and assignments, and finally my dissertation. I would sleep for about three hours and then start studying at 2am every morning before going to my full-time job. I told my friends that I wouldn’t see them for a few years and then completed the degree with enjoyment and ease. At one point, one of my dissertation advisors asked me to slow down because she couldn’t keep up with my passion and pace. That was grace.
My understanding is decent and perhaps better than a lot of other folks, however it is no match for trusting God to direct my path. This Proverb I adopted to guide my life in my early teens was the best decision I ever made because He has never steered me wrong.