I am surrounded by stuff. Most of it we’ve purchased, some was inherited, and a lot has been gifted to us over the years from friends and family. Accumulating stuff is easy. Getting rid of it so that it doesn’t clutter the mind or become a burden to family after we’re gone isn’t easy.
Since I retired, I’ve made several attempts to downsize. I’ve donated my business clothes, shoes, handbags and sorority paraphrenia. I gifted cherished Christmas decorations to family members. I went through my kitchen and donated duplicate kitchen utensils and fad items that once seemed like a good idea but went untouched. I donated pots and pans and mixing bowls and my collection of lunch bags, coffee mugs, and sugar and creamer sets. But I still have too much stuff. I stopped adding to any collections and I rarely purchase anything unless it is a necessity. I realize that I absolutely must make a second round of donations this year. I already have a stack of seasonal throw pillows in my donation pile.
In our wills (one section of our living trust), we’ve designated specific items for family members to inherit when we pass, and we ask that they take whatever they want after that. I’ve directed them to have a professionally run estate sale for everything else and then the can divide up the proceeds equally. It gives me some comfort to know that there is a plan in place for all the stuff we can’t seem to part with in this life. But that doesn’t mean I shouldn’t continue to make an effort to rid us of unwanted clutter. I just feel lighter when I’m not surrounded by so many things. Unfortunately, my husband sometimes stands in the way of my “premature” donations.
I began 2025 by putting away Christmas decorations and setting aside items to send to my children to enjoy in the coming years. There are still Christmas items in the attic that I have yet to address, but I was able to go through several boxes I didn’t open this year while I was putting things away. Some things I will donate because I know the kids won’t want them. My husband was happy to see five Christmas storage boxes emptied on January 2nd. And I do feel lighter.
My next project will be my annual shredding of old files, documents, and receipts. This year I will shred tax returns and documents from 2018. I realize I may be a bit more conservative than some going with seven years instead of five. But I tend to err on the side of caution.
And finally, I’ll ask my husband to help me go through our drawers, boxes, and bins of old electronics and cords. There are so many electronic items that we have been afraid to donate for fear that we might one day need them. In reality, we haven’t looked in some of these bins and boxes for years. We have a Wii system that has been collecting dusk for at least seven years, but he already refused to donate it, thinking guests might want to play with it in the future. I am giving away a digital camera I haven’t used since our trip to Spain in 2010, and some handheld electronic games that I can’t even recall the last time we played them. At the end of 2024, he actually donated his turntable and Bose speaker system, but he kept his many albums. We have two CD players in the garage and boxes full of CDs even though we haven’t listened to music that way for years. The same is true of our four blue ray players and many DVDs. We’ll have to decide together if we’re ready to let go of any of them. Streaming has become our mode of entertainment and yet we are holding on to these collections. The same is true of my 1000-piece jigsaw puzzles.
Perhaps some items like puzzles, DVDs, albums, and CDs will just have to become part of the estate sale along with my books and my mother’s mink coat that I can’t bear to part with for sentimental reasons. For whatever reason, puzzles, books, DVDs, albums, and CDs are in that emotional attachment category and I’ll just have to give myself grace to keep them until the very end.
The point is that collecting stuff is super easy, but downsizing is not only harder and more time consuming; it isn’t even rational.