At this moment in time, in these United States, I am glad that I only have grandsons. I am concerned that they are men of color, but at least their hopes, dreams, and ambitions are not in immediate danger of being snuffed out simply because they are female. I recognize that some envision a future that also diminishes my grandson’s access to opportunities based on their skin color. And a few evil white men even dream of a future that imprisons, enslaves, or deports men and women of color. But today, young females, of all colors, are under threat.
The public rhetoric of some influential men fuels the sexism that had been held at bay by the rise of feminism. Since gaining the right to vote in 1920 to the ability to make birth control decisions and to open our own checking accounts in the 1970s, women have proven that our mental and emotional acuity as well as our personal ambitions often rival that of men. Our obvious biological differences manifested in less physical strength and our ability to give birth had become secondary considerations because it doesn’t take brute strength to become a doctor, lawyer, scientist, businesswoman, journalist, astronaut, professor, or politician. Once the doors opened to us beyond that of lower paid secretary, teacher and nurse, many of us gladly stepped through those doors.
At first, newly “liberated” women like me flooded the universities in search of an academic degree and a “Mrs.” We didn’t realize it, but we were forging new pathways for our daughters that included big dreams, independence and sometimes a struggle with fertility issues. Our careers featured sporadic employment, motherhood guilt, double duty, divided attention and often divorce. Our daughters witnessed our struggle, and they didn’t graduate from college with future husbands, but with future careers. It made perfect sense to them to delay marriage and especially motherhood. However, no one told them that the female reproductive biology didn’t get the memo about the consequences of delaying motherhood, and so the fertility industry gained a new level of prominence. I’m proud that this generation of women boldly pushes new boundaries, entering the remaining male-dominated careers. It’s no longer shocking to see a female airline pilot, although some still feel a bit of unease. I don’t.
Not surprisingly, there were always more physical and more left-brained females among us. We labeled them “Tom Boys”. But now they have the opportunity to pursue careers in sports, engineering, construction, policing, and the military. It’s true that they continue to fight for equity in pay and promotion. Unlike the women who preceded them, they were fed a steady narrative of competence and empowerment, a completely different narrative from the sexism I grew up with.
I grew up hearing sexism from the pulpit, but not my mother. There is a theology that preaches the superiority of men and their God-given authority over women. A God-fearing woman will submit to her husband. She will keep her opinions to herself if different from her husband’s. She won’t exercise her will above that of the men in her life. That teaching coupled with the noticeable lack of women working as high powered, high paying professionals and the palpable fear of becoming a spinster at age 26 was the reality I grew up with. This was a particular brand of sexism that diminished the ambitions and downplayed the intelligence of women, and I wasn’t having it. I was smart and ambitious and didn’t want to dim my light and feign inferiority for the rest of my life. At age 15, I confided in my eldest brother that if this was what was expected, I wasn’t going to get married. Not realizing he was a feminist, having also been raised by my mother, I listened when he told me that not all men needed to dominate women. And he was right. Thankfully, I didn’t marry sexist men, but feminist men who believed in equality and partnership.
But society in those days worked hard to solidify limited female roles in the minds of girls and boys through television shows like, “Father Knows Best”, “Leave it to Beaver”, “I love Lucy”, and “The Brady Bunch”. The masses were groomed to accept that women were servants to their husbands, less intelligent, and devoted mothers to their children. But Hollywood slowly broke the old mold when new television role models like Mary Tyler Moore, Julia, and Murphy Brown hit the television screen. These were educated single career women. Mary Tyler Moore was a “spinster”, Julia was a black single mother, and Murphy Brown had the audacity to get pregnant and choose to raise the baby on her own. Women were making progress.
So much progress that we almost elected a female president. Twice. We finally had a female vice president and that worked out well. Both female presidential candidates were clearly smarter, more experienced, and more articulate than Donald Trump. However, both the 2016 and the 2024 elections proved too much for some very insecure men (and women). They chose the less qualified male. However, many question whether Kamala Harris really lost. I don’t know. Some, including the current president, say that the election was rigged in favor of the white male, despite his criminality, incompetence, and many moral failings. I will say that the sexist religious right had an agenda, and they had the tech bros on their side. So maybe the 2024 election was rigged.
In the wake of their “win”, emboldened sexist men have become increasingly vocal about their desire to roll back the independence and progress of women. The new vice president, JD Vance, has made a number of remarks that fuel the fire of a re-emerging sexism that is more sinister than ever because despite recognizing the intelligence, ambitions, and actual potential of women to lead, they want to hinder us. They see young men falling behind and they fear increasing male impotence, loneliness, and lost ambition. These are real issues that must be addressed. It’s not helpful that AI will replace human labor, leaving undereducated men behind. There is a real fear that women might supplant men as the dominate gender. So, they are taking decisive actions to suppress and oppress women.
Beyond the rhetoric, they started by taking away the reproductive rights of young women because women tied to motherhood have less time to devote to a job or seeking power and influence in the public sphere. Not only are they trying their hardest to end abortion rights, but the right to contraception as well. They ended DEI programs that expanded education and career opportunities for women. They want those doors closed especially since women are now more highly educated than men. There is a movement among the religious right to lower the age of consent, to make young girls vulnerable to sexual assault and forced marriage. And worse, they are trying to end “no fault” divorce to trap women in unhappy marriages.
The reality is that the religious right is effectively trying to imprison women in homes with husbands standing guard. They are working to erase the accomplishments of women from the history books and the public sphere. They know that girls can’t aspire to become what they can’t see as a possibility. And now there is a movement to prevent women from voting. It is no surprise that they are elevating the voices of traditional wives to say that being a submissive wife and mother is the way things should be.
All these things are happening in real time. The religious right is no different than the Taliban in their thinking when it comes to the role of women on the earth. They see us as second-class citizens, underserving of anything more than a basic education and completely dependent on men for our welfare. They know we aren’t stupid, nor incapable, but they need us to pretend to be to feed their egos and advance their ambitions without competition from us. They are willing to use brute force and their political power to co-opt the ambition of our daughters and granddaughters. They will utilize coercion, persuasion, public ridicule, and legislation if necessary.
However, we can’t allow them to do this. Harming women to help men is not the answer. We should know by now that cutting off half the brain power in a society doesn’t encourage innovation and slows down problem solving, stifling human progress. We must recognize their misguided agenda and reject it while we can by voting for pro-female equity candidates.
On an individual level, I would advise young women to keep their passports updated. I would advise marriage to a true feminist. And if getting married, I’d advise against changing her last name. I’d advise young women to secure both a trade and an education before having children. I’d advise against waiting until 35 to have children. And finally, I would advise young women against setting up residence in a red state. The blue states are safer with regards to protecting the health and civil liberties of young women.
I don’t believe it’s possible to take this entire generation of young women back to the 1950s. The human spirit is far too strong to remain oppressed for extended periods of time. So, even if they briefly intimidate or brainwash young women into submission with their oppressive laws and actions, women will eventually rise up demanding liberation again.