Fully Present Post 50

I asked myself this week whether rules, mandates, and laws are necessary? And if they are, why is it that some people break them with impunity while others are held to the strictest codes? In particular, these last few years have been stressful with newly invented rules, mandates, and laws on the one hand and the constant breaking of established rules, mandates, and laws on the other. The constant flux is both frustrating and confusing, especially when the changing rules, mandates, and laws are detrimental to our safety, our education, our civility, and our democracy. Do we even need or want rules, mandates, and laws to govern our behavior?

I suppose what I believe about human behavior informs my opinion about the need for rules, mandates, and laws as well as their enforcement. It comes down to the degree of faith I have that my fellow humans will behave in a public manner that is decent, reasonable and beneficial to society without the assistance of behavioral boundaries. My answer is, “not much”. I don’t have much confidence that my neighbors, family, friends, or leaders will to be considerate of others without them. And yet sometimes the rules, mandates, and laws themselves are immoral and deserve to be challenged. Civil disobedience is absolutely essential to challenge and overturn laws that discriminate and harm people.

Rules provide us with structure within our families, communities and institutions. They are an agreed upon set of behaviors that make our interactions with others safe and predictable. We start learning them as soon as we are born. For example, a rule each of my breastfeeding babies learned was not to bite mama’s breast. My swift and highly negative reaction to that first bite was enough to ensure that not one of them bit me a second time. By kindergarten, most children have learned to share, take turns, to reframe from hitting others, to follow the instructions of the teacher, and to say, “please” and “thank you”. Rules help us to get along with others without continuous conflict and a constant battle of the wills. Without rules, the determined, the strongest, and the bully always gets his way. However, history reminds us that we must be suspicious of rules made by bigots and bullies because other people will suffer. Rules are only enforceable through social means. So, when someone breaks social rules, they experience the displeasure of the entire community. In the past, the fear of public shaming, physical violence, or even death was enough to ensure people obeyed the rules.

Mandates are rules put in place by those whom we have given the authority to lead. It could be a parent, a teacher, a boss, a school board, or a governmental leader. Mandates are rules meant to respond to conditions faced by the community to benefit the whole by keeping everyone safe or helping things run more smoothly. A parent might mandate a new bedtime in response to their kids having difficulty waking up in the morning. A teacher mandates an assignment deadline. A boss might mandate new work hours in response to consumer demand. A school board might mandate face masks in response to a pandemic. And a governor might mandate vaccines to prevent unnecessary deaths and the collapse of the healthcare system. So long as a mandate helps and does not harm people, it should be supported.

And then there are laws. Laws are carefully thought-out restrictions meant to provide legally enforceable guardrails for human behavior in service to the public good. Laws tell us what we can and cannot do within a particular city, state, country, and even internationally. We have police to issue citations or to arrest suspected law breakers and to deliver them to the justice department who determines whether or not there is sufficient evidence to prosecute them for breaking a given law. A jury of their peers might be called upon to determine whether or not the law was broken. And a judge will ascribe the penalty for the crime. In our country, a person convicted of breaking an existing law has the right to appeal their conviction to the Supreme Court if they believe that the law itself violates their rights under the Constitution. It often takes massive violations of a particular law before that happens, making civil disobedience an important tool for overturning unjust laws.

However, what we are witnessing today is a dangerous collapse of our system of rules, mandates, and laws because they are not based on benefiting the public, but on satisfying the immoral desires of bullies. I first noticed something was really wrong when Donald Trump announced his presidency despite having broken all the rules of common decency and morality both in his personal life and in his businesses. His was openly bigoted. He insulted and called his opponents names. He admitted to sexually assaulting women. He lied about everything. He bragged about his wealth and his brains. And he never apologized for anything. For some who wanted the freedom to be bigoted, rude, and obnoxious, he was a breath of fresh air, and they supported him. We later learned that many of his supporters were too embarrassed to publicly admit their support. They didn’t want to be lumped in the “deplorable” category. His winning the election was a blow to our system of rules, mandates, and laws that had been marching toward greater justice and decency.

Another blow to positive progress was when Senator Mitch McConnell refused to hold hearings on President Obama’s Supreme Court nominee, Merrick Garland. For the sake of Republican political power on the Supreme Court, he broke a longstanding Constitutional mandate that the Senate provide advice and consent for a president’s Supreme Court nominee. Instead, he introduced a new rule that there would be no hearing close to an election. Of course, with an evil smile he later broke his own rule under Trump and provided an advice and consent hearing for a justice even closer to the election than Obama’s nominee. In addition, McConnell changed the longstanding rule that required 60 votes to approve lifetime appointments to federal and supreme court justices. Instead, he lowered it to a simple majority, seizing extraordinary Republican influence on the legal system. And the final blow from McConnell was his refusal to find Trump guilty in his two impeachment trials, despite overwhelming evidence of criminal and moral wrongdoing.

It is fair to say that Donald Trump and Mitch McConnell paved the way for the broken rules of common decency in America and opened the door for a slew of immoral laws and ridiculous violations of public health mandates. Under their leadership, the rule of law is in jeopardy.

Mask and vaccine mandates are under fire from people who either believe lies, are deplorable in their selfishness, or a combination of both. Some of these people have died, caused others to die, or have stressed our healthcare systems to the brink of collapse. How is it okay for 2500 people to die every day when we have vaccines and masks to prevent those deaths? It’s scary to think these ill-informed bullies are prolonging a pandemic that causes needless deaths and hurts the economy because Trump and McConnell destroyed the guardrails wherein social pressure once led people to do what was beneficial for the community.

And finally, we continue to watch the over-policing of people of color followed by too many wrongful convictions and longer sentences. The justice system has shown itself to be controlled by politics, given that Trump has been breaking law after law without arrest and prosecution. We are quickly becoming a country absent any accountability for rules, mandates, and laws for the well-placed white male. And as we watch these things erode with each passing day, every day of inaction on the part of the Department of Justice with regard to Trump, emboldens the bullies. One day our communities and our nation will be governed, not by reasonable rules, mandates, and laws for the public good, but by the selfish whims of the uniformed, the violent, and the indecent.

Within the past few months, I’ve had numerous conversations with family and friends about how the actions of Trump and the Republicans threaten our democracy, freedoms, and the rule of law. While they express universal agreement about the threats, there is no commitment to join the fight to save our country beyond voting. It’s not that they don’t care enough, but more that they aren’t inclined to join the fight.

The mindset that I’ve found to be most prevalent is apathy or a lack of concern. I’m assuming that many people are like my close associates. Some believe that none of what happens in the country’s politics will actually affect how they live. As a result, they believe it’s a waste to invest their time, energy or money in a political struggle. The completely apathetic have to be convinced to vote. Others believe in the power of prayer to the extent that they take this burden to the Lord and leave it there for God resolve on our behalf, saying that perhaps these are the end times and things are supposed to get really bad before Jesus returns. And then there are the “don’t worry, be happy folks” who don’t want to hear, “no bad news”. They surround themselves in positivity and blissful ignorance. Apathy makes authoritarianism and legalized oppression possible.

Another reason expressed for not engaging in our current political struggle is a legitimate preoccupation with work, illness, and family life. It makes sense that work, illness, and family life take up massive amounts of emotional and physical energy and time, leaving little to no time nor energy to watch the news, let alone do anything about it. The busiest among my family members and friends were largely unaware of some of the issues we were facing. They had a vague idea that something was wrong but had no time nor energy to get sucked into it. There are others who are willfully distracted by the desire to enjoy life above all else. They are too distracted by television, video games, sports, and partying to engage in real life issues. This group of distracted folks will vote only if it’s convenient and if they aren’t too tired. The overly distracted are the unwitting enablers of authoritarianism and legalized oppression.

And then there are the fearful. They are afraid to speak up about their beliefs for fear of offending people, alienating people, losing relationships, or being judged. Others are afraid of current threats or future threats should things turn south. They don’t want to leave a trail of opposition that might lead to violence or imprisonment in the future. They point to the KKK cross burnings, the lynching of black people, the acts of intimidation, the arrest of protestors, and the growing number of death threats and believe their personal safety depends on their silence. The threat of armed poll watchers may stop them from voting. However, history tells us that intimidating people into silence is a tool of the authoritarian and the oppressor. The tyrant depends on the coward to gain ground. We are seeing this play out in real time with Trump and how he took over the Republican Party and is making them disregard our Constitution, decency, and the rule of law. The cowardly silence and compliance of the Republican leadership has opened the door to an overthrow of our democracy in favor of a Trump authoritarian government where elections are truly rigged in his favor and opponents are thrown in jail.

And finally, I’m amazed by my family and friends who have no sense of agency with regard to what happens in their lives or in the country. They are resigned to a false notion that others, not them, decide everything. They throw up their hands and say that they can’t do anything or that nothing is going to change. When I was in education, I encountered students who didn’t believe their voice, nor their actions mattered. I would spend time convincing them that this was their community and that they had a say in its future, too. I would tell them that they did not have to accept injustice nor mistreatment. I had to convince them that just because that was how things were didn’t mean that was how things had to stay. I truly believe that each person can be an agent of change and I was able to convince many of my students of this fact. Those with a resignation mindset don’t bother to vote because they don’t believe their vote matters. Given the Republican efforts to install partisan election officials who can disregard election results, they might be right if we don’t stop these changes.

In my retirement, I am doing my best to convince as many people as possible to join the fight for our democracy. I’m witnessing firsthand the apathy, distractions, fears, and resignation among family and friends and it scares me. If we don’t collectively get beyond our immediate self-interest and do just a little bit in this fight, like vote, then our democracy will be lost and restoring it will be an even harder task.

In truth, even the busiest, most distracted, or fearful person can donate to upstanding candidates or organizations like NAACP or ACLU or Moveon.org who are fighting the legal battles for civil rights and voting rights. How long does it take to send an email to a local lawmaker expressing your support for equal access to voting or your opposition to banning books in our schools? Is it possible to carve out 15 minutes in the day to watch NPR for news? Will enough people be determined enough to defy history, overcome voter suppression, and vote in the mid-terms this year to increase democrat majorities in the House and Senate?

Our collective future as a democracy is at stake. So, these days, I’m sounding the alarm along with others with the hope that enough citizens will join the fight to save our country before it’s too late. I’ve determined that I’ll keep sounding the alarm, keep donating, keep writing to lawmakers, keep supporting good candidates for office, and I’ll vote in the mid-terms. My hope is that others will join me and that the apathetic, the distracted, the fearful, and the resigned will at the very least vote in 2022 and 2024 to preserve our nation.

The right-wing chatter questioning the qualifications of black female nominees for the Supreme Court has already begun. And so has their colorblind and rose-colored distortion of American history and society. They know that for white supremacy to endure, Republican leaders need a few spurious narratives to exist in the minds of white Americans. So, they continue to perpetuate the notions that 1) blacks are inherently under-qualified; 2) that a person’s race doesn’t matter; and 3) that this is an equitable society where every person succeeds based on the merits of a level playing field. These absurd claims are attempts to hide their actual racism while they shamelessly imply that black women lack the mental acuity to be on the Supreme Court.

When I was an educator at the university level, I worked with many white students who found themselves confronted for the first time with the notion of white privilege and racial inequity. They came to the University believing in the existence of a level playing field. As a result, they would get angry and complain that certain people were unfairly given preferential treatment or special programs because they were black or brown. They would argue that the Civil Rights Movement made everything and everyone equal. They believed that it was admirable to be colorblind. However, they soon became confused when their black friend got stopped by the police while driving because the seat belt looked like it was on funny. They were confused as to why their black roommates couldn’t afford to buy pizza or go on that cool weekend getaway. They thought it was odd that the black premed major sitting next to them had never even seen the periodic table, never used a microscope, and had never dissected anything. They had grown up with the mythology that their black and brown peers were experiencing life and school in the same way as them. A few wealthy or sponsored blacks had similar upbringings to them, but the vast majority had not.

The reality is that most of the schools in the U.S. are segregated by race and economics. And those schools are by no means equal. I learned this firsthand when I was a child. Our family moved to a predominately white neighborhood when I was in the 4th-grade and so we attempted to attend the local white elementary school. It was the most magnificent school I had ever seen with these beautiful brick buildings. The classroom was cool and fancy and even the crayons were beautifully pointed and new. This school had a wonderful cafeteria that served hot lunches every day. I was amazed at how clean everything was and being the introvert, I cared little that none of the children bothered to befriend me. However, it took only a week for the school to inform my mother that we were not welcome and that we should attend an elementary school in another neighborhood. We left that school.

At the new school, I recognized the differences immediately. First, missing were the beautiful brick buildings and before me stood those familiar beige bungalows. All the cool stuff was absent including the cafeteria. Here, they had a hot dog day every Thursday. The second thing I noticed was that there was only a handful of black students and even fewer white students. This was a predominately Asian elementary school. For the first time I found myself surrounded by primarily Japanese students who were as interested in me as I was in them. And like me, most of them they cared deeply about school. The competition for the best grades was on and I enjoyed every minute of my competition with Bobby Ichihashi for top student, despite the lack of resources. Today, I consider myself lucky to have been at that school where striving for academic excellence was more important than beautiful buildings and creature comforts. A bonus was learning about the foods, living spaces, contributions, and values of Japanese Americans.

It is treacherous that the history most of the white college students I encountered during my career included a brief recounting of America’s dark discriminatory, exploitative, and predatory history. However, they had also been led to believe that everything magically became equal and equitable in America after Martin Luther King, Jr and the Civil Rights Movement pushed the country to provide equal protection under the law. As a result, many white students initially viewed laws like Affirmative Action as reverse discrimination. Strategically hidden from their view was the survival of inferior segregated schools, an unfair criminal justice system as well as ongoing employment, housing and banking discrimination. These unseen obstacles effectively handicapped black and brown people while they were allowed to progress unimpeded. But white students and arguably white Americans in general don’t know this. Believing the myth of a level playing field makes it easy to blame black people for their continued poverty and high rates of incarceration.

While in graduate school, at both the masters and doctoral levels, I would study the educational achievement gap in great detail after attending my first lecture on the subject in 1997. The speaker was Dr. Richard Ramirez. I then read many academic articles and books on the topic, the most influential book being, “Savage Inequalities: Children in America’s schools” by Jonathan Kozol. I read two of his other books, “Amazing Grace: The lives of children and the conscience of a nation” and “The Shame of the Nation: The restoration of apartheid schooling in America”. Later, I had the opportunity to hear him speak at a conference and had an insightful conversation with him afterwards.

Being in higher education, I’ve had the blessing of reading the works, attending the lectures and then conversing with some of my greatest social justice heroes. But more important that gaining insight from these incredible thinkers is my lived experience as a black woman of a certain age in America. I know what it is like to have to be more than qualified for a job. I also know what it is like to have my qualifications and accomplishments publicly diminished, ignored, stolen, or even hidden. It has happened to me far too many times. While it is personally hurtful, it is also contrived to preserve the false narrative of white supremacy.

Black and brown excellence is a threat to white supremacy. While black and brown people are no more and no less talented nor intelligent than white people, in order to present us as inferior, they work hard to hide the heavy weights they place around our ankles that hinder our progress in the race for economic and political influence. They once wanted white school children to believe that everything became equal after Civil Rights, they now want to wipe out the entire history of slavery, Jim Crow, Japanese Internment, Indian genocide, etc.

The ultimate goal of the white supremacist is to be able to point to people of color and say that their poverty and incarceration and low status in society is a problem of their own making. When I put the pieces together: prohibit abortion, erase history, question black qualifications, over-police, but praise their value as entertainment, I reach the conclusion that none of this is random.

It may be cynical for me to believe that Republican leaders want to force pregnant black women to have babies to impede their educational, career and economic progress while at the same time preserving a flow of cheap labor. If Republicans can erase history, our lack of progress becomes our personal failures rather than the result of exploitation, discrimination and violence against us and leaves the door open for new atrocities. If Republicans question our qualifications, they effectively raise the bar continuing the reality that blacks must be more qualified than whites for the same position. If Republicans over-police. they eliminate competition through incarceration and feed a for-profit prison system. If they praise only our value as entertainment, they not only demean us as existing for white pleasure but limit our prospects for success in other careers. And finally, if they suppress our right to vote, they are free to enact any and all laws that inflict further impede our progress.

As I write this essay today, I am observing the banning of books, the suppression of voting rights, the push for banning abortion, and the public demand that black female nominees for the Supreme Court be far qualified than their white counterparts.

I spent a lot of time during my years in higher education encouraging students to believe that the campus and the world itself belonged to them too and that they had an obligation to use their voices to help shape these spaces into places they can thrive in. I was simply passing on the sense of agency I gained from several of my teachers and mentors. From these early influencers, I learned that it mattered whether or not I shared my opinion. I learned that one person can make a difference. I learned that silence was consent. And I learned that if you don’t try, you have already lost.

Over the years I had to repeatedly refute arguments like: “No one is going to listen to me” or “They’re not going to change their minds no matter what I say” or “I’m just going to mind my own business” or “I don’t want to make waves”. But the argument I hate the most to this day is “I don’t have time to be bothered.”

A former professor once told me that my voice and my vote is magnified because others remain silent. A political aide confirmed to me that politicians view each letter, email, or phone call they receive as representing many more opinions than just the person who wrote in or called. She explained how important it was to hear from constituents because it gave the lawmaker a clearer picture of what people wanted. She said that people had no idea how influential their voices actually are. I recall how some lawmakers have said that it is up to their constituents to push them to do the right things. Of course, dark money has entered the scene, giving corporations and the wealthy an added advantage to push their agenda. It means that it will take more of us to push for our concerns to be heard.

Last week, I mailed a letter to Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell, expressing my heartfelt sentiments on current political issues. My thoughts were too lengthy to fit the allotted online email contact form, so rather than leave anything out, I went old school.

Below is the content of the letter:

January 11, 2022

Dear Senator Mitch McConnell and Senate Leaders,

I write this letter feeling dismayed, frustrated, confused, and in real fear for the future of our country.  How is it that the Republican Party has allowed itself to be taken over by a man who clearly puts his own fragile ego and personal pocketbook above our democracy?  As a student of history, I’ve watched how the Republican Party embraced this new demagogue, Trump, in much the same way the conservatives in Germany embraced Hitler, allowing lies and disinformation and scapegoating to divide that nation.  Is the Republican thirst of power so great that you are willing to burn down the country to secure it?  Or is your belief in white Christian supremacy so deeply engrained that you are willing to throw away democracy and the rule of law entirely?  To my eyes and the eyes of many in the nation, this is how it looks.  The constant lying by Fox News, Newsmax, and other conservatives in the interest of inciting violence in order to gain political power makes me genuinely worried for the future of my children and grandchildren.  A country where guns, misinformation, lies and scapegoating are promoted by leaders who know the truth leads to a violent and dangerous future for us all.  Trump Republicans are out of control, threatening elected officials from congress to school boards and everyday citizens with violence. 

The Republican political machine has eroded trust in elections, has ignored the rule of law, has become mean-spirited, and has shown itself to be cowardly in the face of a bully named Donald J. Trump. 

Your failure to impeach Trump twice when he was clearly in violation of his oath of office effectively demonstrated your Party’s willingness to make the legislative branch of government subordinate to the presidency.  This is not healthy for our nation and I believe you know it.

And now the Republican Party across the country is doing everything it can to make it more difficult for citizens to vote.  In addition, I can’t imagine how any reasonable person thinks we can have a fair election moving forward by placing partisan election officials in place who can overturn the will of the electorate if they don’t like the results.  There will be riots in the streets unlike anything we have seen.

I know you and most Republican officials know that there was no widespread voter fraud and that Trump loss the 2020 election.  And yet, your Party and your news organizations continue to lie about it in concert with Trump.  The record must be set straight for the sake of the country and our democracy.

The way forward is to become a Party with ideas that appeal to the American people, not a Party that strategizes to steal future elections.  No citizen should have to wait 9-11 hours to vote.  No citizen should be prevented from mailing in a ballot or dropping it off in a drop box.  Many citizens work and voting should be easier, not harder.  We know who our citizens are and when they are of voting age.  Why not pre-register every citizen to vote and send them a ballot directly? 

I’m writing to you and your Republican leadership in the hope that you will turn away from Trump and the destructive path your party has taken–a path away from our democracy and the rule of law and toward tyranny.  I implore you to find the courage to do what is right.  Find the courage to work for all Americans and to preserve our Constitution.  Please save our nation from men and women like Trump who desire power and wealth above all decency and humanity. Do what is your patriotic duty.  

Sincerely,

Dr. Juanita Hall

Citizen of the United States of America

I’ve been on Facebook since 2008. For most of that time, I’d describe myself as a “Facebook voyeur” content to keep up with the life events of family members, old friends, colleagues, and former students. I rarely posted much and if I did, I paid almost no attention to likes or comments. My notifications, friend requests, and instant messages got little, if any, attention for months at a time. I was on Facebook to observe, not to contribute. But that has changed since the election of Trump and the disruption of COVID-19.

I haven’t changed as a person. I’ve always been an outspoken advocate on issues of social justice, human decency, and compassion for humanity. That advocacy was expressed in my work with and on behalf of students, in my community as a volunteer, in my giving of financial resources, and in my consistent communication with political leaders. What has changed is my engagement on social media platforms.

The pandemic physically separated me from my students and colleagues. Suddenly, we weren’t having those important discussions or rallies or meetings of the mind around important social justice issues. I was no longer sitting with friends, colleagues, or students providing a listening ear to life dilemmas or encouraging the discouraged. I think the absence of a regular platform on a university campus and at academic conventions initially because of COVID-19 restrictions and then from my own retirement forced me look for an alternative outlet to continue advocating for of a better society and helping individuals navigate life. That platform became Facebook, Twitter, and now Instagram.

One of the things that became apparent was that I’m not very good at using these new tools. I’m thankful to my daughters who tutor me. This past week, my younger daughter spent a couple of hours teaching me how to use Instagram. I learned from my older daughter that I need to respond to people, so I’ve done that. However, you can’t just say anything. I got put on time a one-day suspension on Twitter for replying to Congressman Jim Jordan that his pandemic lies were killing his constituents. In the Twitter world, that bit of truth was a bridge too far.

I also learned that not everyone who sends me an instant message has good intentions. In fact, I received two scam attempts from people pretending to be someone else. The first was someone pretending to be a colleague whom I knew personally. Red flags quickly came up and I stopped responding. The second was a message from a deceased friend. I reported that person to Facebook. No surprise that there are people with bad intentions on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. Among the three, I find Twitter to be the most combative, hence the phrase, “Twitter wars” is a thing. Since becoming active, I’ve found myself engaged in a couple of them: one involving a woman’s right to choose and another about vaccines. I’m disappointed by how quickly some people resort to personal attacks when their arguments fall apart.

I learned not to befriend everyone who sends a friend request. Since I am creating content that I want people to see, to increase my views, I recently put out a lot of friend requests to people with whom I have at least 40 common friends. However, I noticed that my political and social justice content has inspired what I believe to be a lot of white male “Trump” folks to make “friend” requests. I’ve ignored those requests, having once been threatened with violence by one of them. I had to unfriend that person.

As an analytical person, I rarely shy away from an argument among my “friends”. So, on occasion, I will get into a back and forth with someone on an issue I believe is important. I had to explain to my children why I bother with people who say ridiculous things. My reasoning is that I feel a duty to that person and to those who read their comment to provide an opposing viewpoint. I wouldn’t allow half-backed ideas to pass in my classrooms and I won’t scroll past them on Facebook or Twitter if the issue is important. I view challenging misinformation or specious comments as my duty to society.

The opportunity to fulfill my calling as an educator, counselor, and a social justice advocate is what continues to get me out of bed in the morning with a pep in my step. Every day, I look forward to finding creative ways to share my ideas about current events that affect our lives now and in the future. And more importantly, I’m constantly looking for ways to inspire others to take an active role in creating the kind of life and society we all want to live in.

But the truth is, I still enjoy looking at the travel pictures, the babies, the wedding pictures, the food pictures and holiday decorations. I’ve even joined a couple of BTS fan groups: BTS! Dope Old People, BTS Army Over 40, and BTSArmyMom International. However, I must confess that I’m just a little frustrated when pictures of my homegrown tangerines receive many more likes and responses than my commentary on preserving our voting rights.

This past week we recognized the first anniversary of a violent attack on our Capitol by a motivated mob of Trump supporters’ hell bent on stopping the certification of a presidential election by hanging Mike Pence and other lawmakers. By their own admission on videotape and in court, the insurrectionists claimed that they were sent to the Capitol by Donald J. Trump because they believed his claims, despite any credible evidence, that the November 2020 presidential election was stolen from him. However, I argue that it was never really about a stolen election.

In fact, there was ample evidence to the contrary that this had been a fair election, completely devoid of the level of fraud needed to overturn any electoral votes. Biden had won the popular vote by over 7 million legally cast ballots. Trump’s failure to produce evidence of fraud in dozens of courts didn’t matter. The testimonies of Republican election officials and the attorney general upholding the integrity of the election didn’t matter. Multiple audits confirming Trump’s loss didn’t matter. Even with Fox News being sued for defamation by voting machine companies and Trump lawyers losing their law licenses over filing baseless lawsuits hasn’t been enough to stop the narrative of a stolen election. These insurrectionists and their sympathizers have chosen to continue with the false narrative of a stolen election because it is too awful to admit that what they are actually reacting to is the threat of losing “their” country to white liberals, people of color, LGBTQ folks, feminists, non-Christians, and in particular, Jews.

At times like this, I turn to history, human nature, and big picture thinking to understand a problem before trying to find a way forward. History and human nature tell me that we have been here before. White men in this country like Donald Trump, Steve Bannon, Sean Hannity, Tucker Carlson, Rudy Giuliani, Mitch McConnell, Lindsey Graham, Ron Johnson, and Rick Scott who are motivated by greed and power, have always been willing to limit democracy whether through legislation or violent intimidation. Our history tells us that the conservative white seat of power and wealth does not relinquish its hold on either without a legal fight or actual violence. And since the founding of this nation and even beyond the Civil War, we have been fighting to reach the ideal that all men are created equal as set forth in our Constitution. It’s been a bloody and very rocky road with conservative white males in power fighting against the progress of women and minorities each step of the way. And they have always used fearmongering and inflammatory rhetoric to stir up insecure “Christian” whites to do their violent dirty work.

The presidency of Barrack Obama was a sign to those old school conservative white Americans that they were in danger of losing their control and supremacy over what they considered “their” country. Donald Trump merely said out loud what was etched in the minds of too many insecure white people: that the opportunities, wealth, and control of this nation belongs to them and “those outsiders” were trying to steal “their” country away from them. The insecure and largely uneducated white masses who identified as conservative white Christians listened and then clothed themselves in an American flag, calling themselves patriots, as they deny the humanity, dignity, and Americanness of people of color, LGBTQ folks, feminists, and non-Christians. They seek to preserve a nation that was never great for citizens other than ambitious rich white men. And in truth, it was never really all that great for them either, but at least they weren’t outsiders. They are “real” Americans.

It is no coincidence that the Republican Party has successfully stacked the Supreme Court in their favor, failed twice to impeach Trump despite clear evidence of his guilt, and that some voted not to certify the 2020 election. We should all note with concern how Republicans have thwarted every effort to limit gun regulations while right-wing commentators and lawmakers elevate a person like Kyle Rittenhouse to hero status. They need their army ready and willing to perpetrate violence and according to a recent poll, they have succeeded. It is becoming clear that the attempt to overthrow the election was planned by a growing number of Republicans in the White House, in Congress, and in other places such as Fox News. I believe they intended to use the rally and the insurrection as their first blow. However, it didn’t succeed.

In fact, it had the opposite effect as millions of Americans, like me, watched the event in horror and laid the blame squarely at the feet of President Trump. Attempts by Republican congressmen and rightwing media to blame others or to downplay the event have largely failed except among those insecure white folks. The almost laughable narrative that the election was stolen and that there was no insurrection on January 6th is just the continuation of a cover for the Republican Party to continue to try to thwart democracy by suppressing voting rights in Republican held states.

Our democracy is in actual danger. The civil rights gained by people of color, feminists, LGBTQ people, and non-Christians are being threatened. And they are being threatened by wealthy and powerful conservative white men who are determined to hold onto their ill-gotten gains through legislation upheld by their stacked courts and by creating an army of scared white Christian terrorists whom they have convinced that “their” country and their value as white people is being stolen from them. Ironic, given that their ancestors brutally stole land, labor, and human lives to secure their position in the first place. But of course, they also want to erase that bit of U.S. history.

Given this reality, it should come as no surprise that no Republicans are in favor of the new voting rights legislation. They are aware that they can’t win on their policies and ideas of white Christian supremacy in a multicultural society, so they will keep as many of “them” from voting as possible or legally overturn results they don’t like. If these tactics fail, they will once again incite their misinformed, insecure, gun-toting white conservative Christians to violence. This is where we are.

At this point, it is up to the Department of Justice to prosecute the laws that are already on the books that make election tampering, fraud, dereliction of duty, and inciting an insurrection illegal. Section three of the Fourteen Amendment actually bars elected officials who engage in insurrection or give aid and comfort to insurrectionists from holding office or running for office. It is our responsibility to pressure the Attorney General do his job. It is also up to those who are being defamed by the lies used in service to these white male conservatives to file defamation lawsuits against them like Dominion did.

The 2022 mid-term elections have never been more important. Securing a larger majority in the House and Senate is the only way to ensure our democracy, the rule of law, and continued progress toward civil rights. If we are not careful, we will no longer have representation in our government and the laws governing this nation will once again become discriminatory and oppressive, favoring white Christian male heterosexuals with money and screwing the rest of us again.

It’s a given that being human means that each passing year will have both good times and bad. However, I’d say that 2021 was different. It was a far more turbulent ride riddled with a constant barrage of fearful moments, frustrating moments, angry moments, sad moments and a brief reprieve of happy moments. I’m honestly not too optimistic that 2022 will be much better, but how I respond to the upcoming challenges will determine whether or not I have any regrets.

There were some powerful problems facing our nation and our family in 2021. Among the national problems were the ongoing pandemic, the January 6th insurrection, the effects of climate change. We were able to see light at the end of the tunnel when a vaccine was rolled out. We got double vaccinated and then got boosted. However, Republican politics, misinformation, and conspiracy theories denied our country a collective victory over Covid-19 and opened the door for variants. The January 6th Trump inspired insurrection shocked us and then frustrated us when Republicans refused to convict him in the Senate for his attempt to overthrow a fair a free election. Trump’s lies ushered in a sustained attack on our democracy using Republican run state legislatures to pass anti-democratic election laws. And as if this wasn’t enough, we experienced the dangerous effects of climate change with draught, fires, and tornadoes. The national turmoil happened in tandem with the challenges our family faced in 2021.

For starters, my husband’s lung cancer returned. He underwent another surgery, followed by 38-radiation treatments in conjunction with chemotherapy. Even as I write this, we are still dealing with the physical and emotional toll from that challenging course of treatment. It is emotionally taxing to witness the person you love in constant pain, especially when there is little to nothing you can do to mitigate it. I thought the world was cruel when in the midst of this cancer recurrence, my grandson was born a month early and my second daughter was hit with a severe case of Bell’s Palsy. I spent a lot of time praying and a lot of energy trying to be positive and encouraging despite my internal fears. And sadly, a few family members, dear friends, personal heroes, and national icons passed away in 2021.

But there were causes to rejoice in 2021 as well. My husband is still here and will begin a two-year maintenance treatment to prevent the cancer from returning. My grandson James Edward is happy, healthy and so handsome. My daughter has regained much of the movement in her face. In the midst of all this trauma, I retired on July 1st. That turned out to be a joyful and wise decision. I held my breath as I got caught up on all my pandemic-delayed medical exams, including a colonoscopy, mammogram, PAP Smear Test, eye exam, dental exam, dermatology exam, and kidney exam. Even though I desperately need to lose weight, I didn’t have any negative results. And finally, my daughter-in-law started work as a doctor at Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia (CHOPS), ironically working in the neo-natal ward. She also passed her medical board exams. And on a national level, we breathed a sigh of relief when former police officer Derek Chauvin was convicted for the murder of George Floyd. And we should all be satisfied that many of the January 6th insurrectionist were brought to justice, although the master minds and instigators remain to be held accountable for their crimes by the too slow Department of Justice.

While I am glad to see the end of 2021, for the first time in my life, I’m not too optimistic about 2022. I feel like 2022 will also be a year of struggle. We will struggle to get my husband back to good health and pain free. And I will struggle to do my part to help preserve and defend our democracy, the planet, public health, and our basic rights. I will be launching the Better Human Project in conjunction with Inclusion Media Group, writing my weekly blog, commenting on social media sites, supporting Democratic candidates for the House and Senate, writing to elected officials and the Department of Justice, and doing my part to help end this pandemic.

However difficult 2021 was, I got through it without regret. I attribute that victory to time spent in reflection, mediation, prayer, planning and my pen. And I am determined to do the same this year so that win or lose, I will also get through 2022 without any regrets.

I want to start this Better Human reflection on inclusion by acknowledging human nature. I believe that there are only a handful of people in the world who deliberately set out to hurt and harm others. And if we are paying attention, those psychopaths and sociopaths among us reveal their antisocial tendencies, allowing us to wisely steer clear of them. Unlike these rare individuals, the rest of us have varying levels of empathy that prevent us from intentionally hurting others.

But we do hurt others. And most of the harm we inflict on our fellow human beings stems from either our attempts at self-preservation or human error. For example, when I was in my thirties, I was working in a department where I was the only person of color. A few colleagues in the department were throwing a baby shower for a pregnant colleague with whom I was very friendly. However, I was not invited to the baby shower. I was hurt by the obvious exclusion and asked our department head about it. The official explanation was an oversight, but the same thing happened a total of three more times and each time was meant with profuse apologies. I understand that these were not psychopaths hellbent on hurting my feelings. These were human beings conditioned by our American history to not include me. Exclusion makes minorities either hyper-visible or hyper-invisible. True inclusion requires a change in mindset.

Today, many Americans have fallen victim to psychopathic leaders who effectively fuel their need for self-preservation. This time, that empathy silencer, self-preservation, is rooted in fear rather than the greed that haunts our history. School board meetings are filled with white Americans struggling with the reality of U.S. history because they feel empathy for their children’s feelings. They understand the uncomfortable feeling of white guilt and they desperately want to shield themselves and their children from that trauma. They are terrified that learning about the historical hurt and harm inflicted upon women, people of color, LGBTQ people, and persons with disabilities by individual and state-sponsored exclusion will damage their children’s view of themselves and their nation. Misguided parental groups like Moms for Liberty are behind a push to make it illegal to teach the true history in our schools. They are literally using words like diversity and inclusion and white privilege to signal lessons they don’t want their children to hear.

Perhaps without realizing it, they are giving cover to white nationalists like Trump and others. Denying a history of exclusion paves the way to blame minorities for their problems and low status. It is possible that these protesting parents fail to realize that the Trump campaign slogan, “Make America Great Again” only resonates for those who were included in the American dream. As the nation is living with the legacy of exclusionary practices, these parents wrongly want to hide the truth that can contextualize our current situation and therefore pave the way for satisfactory solutions. They instead want to protect their fragile emotions. I say no.

It is time to acknowledge that self-preservation in the form of greed was at the root of Indian genocide, black slavery, and the oppression of women. At the founding of this nation, white males subverted any healthy empathetic impulses by readily accepting the notion (from psychopaths) that Indians were savages, that blacks were sub-human, and that women were childlike. Convince people that LGBTQ people are immoral and people with disabilities are incompetent, and society will allow for all manner of discrimination, exploitation, and mistreatment.

The history they wish to hide is that white males and their families gained wealth and power by excluding women and minorities from decision-making, ownership, citizenship, voting, education, and jobs. It made sense that if you eliminate the competition using a legal system of violence to exploit labor, steal land, rape black women, deny opportunity, and kill with impunity that these things will make you the winner in the game of life. Any reasonable person would call this “ill-gotten” gain. Trump and his supporters know that if they can hide this truth, then they can move on, retaining all they have accumulated guilt-free while covertly maintaining systems of exclusion.

I think it is accurate to surmise that these parents wrongly believe that their children cannot handle the truth that people who came before them did some pretty terrible things and that those actions had lasting negative effects on groups of people living today. They sell themselves short and their children short if they refuse to realize that their empathy will be satisfied if they face the truth and work to do better. That is what practicing inclusion is about.

Inclusion is about recognizing that doors of opportunity were closed for a very long time and that many people were so accustomed to those closed doors that they 1) never prepared for them to open; 2) don’t know how to walk through them and 3) are terrified by the mystery of what’s on the other side of the door. Therefore, inclusion requires a proactive approach, not a passive one. It means taking people by the hand and helping them to walk through open doors. It also means reminding people who have always been able to walk through open doors that the same doors remain open to them. Inclusion doesn’t mean removing people from the table, it means building a bigger table. Parents and white nationalists need to learn this lesson.

Better humans have to “practice” inclusion by continuously noticing the previously excluded. Who is missing from the invitation list? Whose voice is not being heard in this discussion? Whose story is not being told? Who is not applying for this job and who is not getting an interview? The answer to solving our exclusion problem is never more exclusion, but intentional inclusion. And that takes practice.

It has taken a fair amount of self-observation and self-reflection for me to understand and accept myself, particularly when it comes to the subject of helping others. I am neither entirely selfish nor entirely charitable. In Sunday School and scouting, I learned that helping those in need is a virtuous act and a humanitarian responsibility. It also feels good. At school and work, I learned to discern between helping and enabling. I also learned that helping can be unreasonably costly for me and my family and so I adopted the Biblical proverb that “charity begins at home”. The airlines gave me another good rule to follow. They say, “Once you have secured your own air mask, then you can assist those around you.” With these principles in place, finding the right balance for me beyond securing myself and helping my family was something I stumbled upon.

I suppose my approach to helping others is rooted in a part of my personality that is highly empathic. I discovered that I am deeply affected by human suffering to the point that I experience empathy in my body. For example, when my mother broke her foot, my foot swelled up so badly that she carted me off to the doctor for an examination. He diagnosed my ailment as “sympathy pain” and my foot reverted back to normal size almost immediately. My involuntary responses to the physical ailments of family and friends occurred frequently into my late adolescence, prompting my mother to tell me to completely abandon any notion of entering the medical field. Not surprisingly, my response to the emotional suffering of others wasn’t much better, particularly when that suffering related to injustice, suspense, and acts of violence. My kids joke about which movies I can and cannot watch because of my acute emotional responses. One example was during the opening scene of “Saving Private Ryan”. I was crying so hard that my friend suggested I leave. Over the years, I have left many movie theaters, mid-screening, to collect myself or to completely avoid the most emotionally difficult parts. As I’ve gotten older, my tolerance for emotionally taxing stories has gotten worse to the point where I need to know the end of a story before I can read the book or watch the movie.

The point is that my high level of empathy greatly influences my approach to helping others. If I cannot tolerate watching fictional injustice, suspense, violence, and human suffering, imagine the depth of my agony in real life. When I see those things happening to people, I have to do something to help. The only emotional relief I get comes from knowing that I am doing what I can to relieve the human suffering before my eyes. However, I also learned that my approach to helping is a product of recognizing my own limitations.

While I am highly empathetic, I realize that I am also highly judgmental. When I was in my early twenties, I thought I could help young women in juvenile detention. I visited the detention center several times and had conversations with the young women being detained for a variety of serious crimes. I quickly discovered that I was too angry and disappointed by their warped thinking and willingness to harm others that I abandoned the notion that I was the right person to help them. I realized that my generosity didn’t extend to people who harmed themselves or others. I discovered that my heart wasn’t that big after all. Thankfully, there are other people who have the level of compassion needed to help others find redemption, healing, and rehabilitation. I have to admit that I greatly admire the doctors and nurses who continue dealing with unvaccinated COVID-19 patients with patience and compassion these days. I couldn’t do it.

I’m also limited by an acute fear of heights, fire, water, and speed. I’ve never been the dare devil who rides roller coasters, rock climbs, surfs, mountain bikes or jumps out of planes for pleasure. I learned early on that even horseback riding was a bit too much for me. In Costa Rica, I refused the opportunity to zipline, opting to miss the beautiful forest view. In Hawaii, I sat in the boat while my family enjoyed snorkeling off the island of Kauai. And in Italy, I remained seated in the boat when my companions jumped into the crystal blue water of Blue Grotto off the island of Capri. So, it’s highly doubtful that anyone would ever find me on a dangerous rescue mission when it involves confronting these fears.

On a somewhat redeeming note, I realized through a game of “This or That” that as a scaredy cat and introvert my most prominent pattern of helping people over the years has taken the form of writing a check as opposed to physically showing up to help others. I’m not the person you will find on the front lines of a disaster, distributing food, marching in a protest, or canvasing a neighborhood on behalf of a candidate. Over the years, I have done most of these things at least once or twice and quickly discovered that I much prefer behind the scenes preparations, financial donations, or even fundraising. I prefer helping by using my pocketbook, skills, and my handiwork rather than my physical presence. For extroverts and dare devils, helping likely entails very different behaviors.

The final realization about my approach to helping others has to do with a lesson many of us have learned about giving a fish versus teaching a person to fish. I find that I am an advocate of both. Giving a fish solves the immediate problem; teaching to fish deals with the elimination of the need in the long term. I’ve worked to teach my own children to fish, although sometimes I wasn’t 100% effective and they had to learn the hard way. Beyond my family, I donate to Women for Women International, various scholarship funds, and The Boys and Girls Club with the mindset that this kind of helping enables people become the best version of themselves.

However, sometimes helping others in an immediate situation isn’t about teaching anyone a lesson; it’s about mitigating immediate suffering. So, I give to Doctors Without Borders, Unicef, Children’s hospitals, and St. Jude. When a homeless person on the street is asking for money, I tend to give it. He or she isn’t looking for a lesson on how to get a job and become a productive citizen. That person is simply trying to survive through mental illness and/or substance abuse and an inadequate public assistance system. I try to make it a point to give without judgment. In this regard, my husband taught me a different approach by refusing to give money and offering food instead so that the money can’t be spent feeding an addiction. He has a point. He will go out of his way to purchase a sandwich and take it to that person instead. Admittedly, his approach is better than mine.

I didn’t realize that the desire to help others wasn’t a universal human trait. It took a while for me to realize that I was one of those people who could only find fulfillment in my career if it entailed helping others. My parents passed down the notion that it was more important to make a lot of money and then help people on the side. My mother was known for her volunteerism in the community. However, it was only after her death that I pursued my second career as an educator and counselor. My second career made me much happier than my corporate career in finance despite the significant pay cut. I don’t dispute that some people make a ton of money and give a lot of money to charity. However, only a few actually give in proportion to their wealth and without ego-boosting strings attached. I imagine a lot of injustice, pain, and suffering in this world would be significantly reduced if the wealthiest among us actually cared enough to contribute what is needed. They have the means, but not the will. The reality is that many of them don’t even want to pay their fair share in taxes.

Better humans help others. The method may differ according to our personalities and circumstances, but the virtue and humanitarian responsibility of helping our fellow human beings is what better humans are compelled by empathy and conscience to do.