Month: May 2026

Progressives have the opportunity to win the 2026 mid-terms and the 2028 presidential election if they are smart, articulate and strategic in sharing policies that will actually improve lives. I firmly believe that the majority of Americans are sick and tired of the high prices, the incompetence, the cruelty, the cronyism, the corruption, the bigotry, the revenge, the poor policies, the self-dealing, and the rolling back of civil liberties under the Republicans. Life has become harder, not easier, under Republican rule. Personally, I am exhausted by the daily drama. It feels like we are being emotionally attacked every day by hateful rhetoric and sophomoric insults and worse, innocent lives are being lost or ruined because of funding cuts, war, and out of control ICE agents.

This is not how most of us aspire to live. It is not how we want to be viewed by the rest of the world. And anyone with a heart, ears, and a brain can understand that we are in danger of being overrun by “fake” Christian bigots who believe their whiteness, religion, and maleness entitles them to an advantage in this country. Decent people value fairness. They value giving everyone who is willing to innovate and work hard the opportunity to succeed regardless of their race, gender, national origin or religion. Most of us understand that immigration has made us innovative and strong as a country. MAGA Republicans and white nationalists think differently, and they are willing to steal elections to restore the advantages they once built for themselves while subjugating everyone else.

We must acknowledge that we have a few misogynists. We have a few racists. We have some homophobic people. We have white suprematists. We have religious bigots. These people are living among us and they vote. Most are poorly educated, but some of their leaders have an education and have chosen this evil path for selfish reasons. They are not patriots, nor are they actual followers of Christ as they claim. They are brutal criminals at heart who will lie, steal, and kill to feed their ego and greed. We see many of them currently serving in our government because they figured out that making the laws was a good strategy to bend the country to their hateful will. We see them on social media trying to convince others to their demented way of thinking. These hypocrites make laws for others to follow, but excuse, exempt, and even pardon each other of the worse crimes.

Since Trump 2.0, it has become crystal clear where they want to take us. Their agenda is no longer hidden. I firmly believe that the majority of us who value the rule of law, human dignity and human rights will not bend to their will. Most people do not want to be told how to worship, who to love, what to learn, and when to have children. The very idea that these men think they have a right rewrite history, punish truthtellers, and to force women to give birth and to stay married no matter the circumstances is abhorrent to reasonable people. They are actively working to take the vote from people of color and women. It’s appalling to hear some politicians suggest that fining a woman $17,000 for not giving birth by age 30 is a good idea.

The Republicans have become tone deaf to the needs and desires of most Americans. We simply want to live our lives peacefully. We want to be able to afford food, education, healthcare, homes and childcare. We want to be assured that the air we breathe, the food we eat, and the water we drink will not kill us. We want to know that the bridges we drive over aren’t going to collapse beneath us. We want to be assured that those who violate laws will be tried and punished through a fair judicial process. We want to have the respect of the international community so we can travel freely. We want to enjoy our friends and family in peace, without conflict over politics. And we certainly do not want to see the name and image of Donald Trump plastered everywhere!

Politicians who can articulate a plan to deliver these basic necessities as well offer a return to basic sanity, integrity, the rule of law, and common decency will easily win future elections. Many of us are missing the days of “no drama Obama”, when dignity, intelligence, and competence were on full display every day.

I’m optimistic that there are candidates waiting in the wings to offer us the stable, yet progressive future for a better life for all. They only need to step forward and show themselves before it is too late. And when they do, no amount of redistricting or gerrymandering will prevent reasonable people and true patriots from electing them. Because I am convinced that there are more of us than there are of them.

I’m both a participant and an observer of this role called “grandparent”. My social science background compels me to watch and learn and then share my findings. Since becoming a grandmother, I’ve made a few observations that many can relate to. First, I must admit that I absolutely feel the dopamine hit I get every time I see pictures or videos of my grandchildren. I get a deep feeling of love watching my three grandsons’ journey from infancy to toddlerhood to kindergarten. I have a new grandson coming this August and another in the first part of 2027. Yes, it would be nice to have a granddaughter in the mix and perhaps that will happen. I would have been great to have become a grandparent about 10 years sooner, but like many young couples these days, my kids all got a late start.

Even at this age, being in the presence of my grandchildren is pure bliss. That’s why I hopped on yet another airplane and few 5 hours across the country for a two-week visit in Philadelphia. Getting down on the floor is a bit tougher, but I do it. And my energy level isn’t nearly what it used to be. But it is undeniable that most grandparents of any age have all the upsides of being with their grandchildren and none of the downsides if they are lucky enough to never have to step back into the role of parent. At my age, I wouldn’t even attempt to do it. It wouldn’t be fair to my grandchildren.

But I’ve known a few younger grandmothers who ended up raising their grandchildren because of unfortunate circumstances involving the parents. It’s not an ideal situation, but the women I know who did it or are still doing it, deserve high praise. Raising children is best suited for the young and I see the superhuman effort these grandmothers put forth, sometimes without the gratitude and support of the actual parents. I believe their unconditional love for their grandchildren shields the children from any anger and resentment they may have towards the absentee parents.

The thing I’ve noticed more than anything is the willingness of grandparents to spend money they do not have on helping to raise their grandchildren. I recently had lunch with a dear friend who was looking for a part-time job in addition to her full-time position to be able to afford an unreasonable level of generosity towards her adult children and her grandchild in order to keep them close. Hers is a multigenerational household, and her greatest fear is that her son and his wife will move out and take the grandson with them if she charges them a reasonable amount for household expenses. Her retired husband provides full-time childcare, and they pay nearly all the household bills allowing her son and daughter-in-law to work and spend extravagantly.

The fact of the matter is that grandparents can be suckers. We have to check each other to make sure we aren’t doing too much. For a while, I was falling into that trap. I love buying clothes and toys for my grandsons, but sometimes I have to stop myself from overdoing it and from offering to pay for extracurricular activities. Not only is our generosity an expression of our love, but it feels good to give and we really want to ensure that our grandchildren live the best life possible. We want everything for them.

Sometimes that desire makes us a bit too vocal with our advice. It’s hard to bite our tongue and trust that our children will recognize and address the challenges, dangers, and concerns we see. I’ve experienced the wrath of my children for saying too much and it’s not pleasant. I’ve asked them to just listen and thank me for my observation and then do whatever they deem best without feeling defensive or arguing. I realize that they worry they might get something wrong and that they are often a little insecure and so they become easily offended by unsolicited observations or advice. They mistake it for being judged and found lacking when nothing can be further from the truth. I ask myself if some things are even worth mentioning. I try to remind them that I am coming from a place of love and caring, not of distrust or criticism. I’m just an extra pair of loving eyes with life experience that may prove helpful.

Unfortunately, navigating the advice sphere is the toughest part of being a grandparent and I know too many grandparents who have been barred from seeing their grandchildren because they have offended their adult children. They were labeled as controlling or toxic or worse when they were really just deeply concerned about a particular issue. The hurt caused by this fracture negatively impacts both the grandchildren and the grandparents, to say nothing about the fracture in the parent-adult child relationship. Social scientists have begun to publish the actual cognitive and emotional benefits children and grandparent get from spending time together. It is truly a win-win situation, so we need to do our best to preserve the relationship with our adult children.

As a grandparent, I can say with certainty that I experience cognitive and emotional benefits from being with my grandchildren as well. Just this morning, I experienced another dopamine hit from just waking up to the sound of my grandsons playing on the floor above me. So, it is imperative to maintain healthy communication and healthy financial boundaries around the relationship with our adult children. Sometimes that means remaining silent and other times that means putting away the checkbook.

,